One thing that sucks about being a guy is that the general consensus from society regarding managing a bad day or going through something tough, especially in the country boy network aka the South, is “put on the big boy pants and deal” or “hit/shoot at/tackle something until you feel better”. Yeah, true, there are definite mental benefits to spinning roundhouse kicking the living crap out of a heavy bag; but not everyone is still in that kinda shape to come out of it not having had something pop or dislocate. Besides, not every guy (or person for that matter) is wired to redirect and extend internal pain to external application of said pain (which is probably most ideal, tbh). So I submit that everyone, even the burliest of men, when faced with unshakably difficult moments in life, should find something to run to. That’s right, lift your heels and run, get the heck out of wherever you are as fast as you can. Staying put will only tax you more than you already have been, and the perpetuation of your anguish, disappointment, regret, self-criticism, resentment, and anger will just increase until you find yourself far away from where you should be, mentally, spiritually, and potentially physically. That’s where I was for 16 hours last night through this morning, standing under a virtual deluge of heartache, doubt, frustration, and discouragement, all a result of staring down the face of the end of a special relationship that I really came out of my comfort zone for. And even more depressing was that I was mentally and emotionally preparing myself to be in that same spot, under that waterfall of sadness, for the immediate future. At least until I received an epiphany from nowhere but God – “Keef, you’re standing in a heavy rain, and it’s not going to stop for a while. Why not just run to Shelter?” Plain as day advice, so simple and yet incredibly profound – “it’s storming, stupid, seek shelter”. So I did. I immersed myself, and my work day, in as much worship music and exposure to God’s Word and praise to Him as was possible – and you know what? – it helped. It changed my entire outlook on “the storm” – how big it was, how inescapable the downpour was, even how drenched I would ultimately “decide” to get – it was all up to me and the attitude I decided to adopt in that moment. You could say I ran under God’s arms for Shelter – a very smart move b/c that covering is always there, whenever we need – all we have to do is just run to it when the storm comes. God’s Grace supplied me with some much needed shelter, and I’m convinced my day and my current outlook and attitude would be at their worst had it not.
But before thinking that might be too “spiritual” or “metaphysical” for your tastes, God is equally as amazing and wonderful with “practical”. His “practical” advice for me today, in the midst of worship and praise and prayer to Him for being so awesome? “Find purpose in your work” and “take a shower”. 😄 No, really, that’s it. So you know what? I did. I put keen focus into my work today while jamming to some worship music, and then after the work day was over (and super-productive, by the by), took the longest, warmest, most guilt-free, conservation-less shower I can remember ever taking; and it was amazeballs, and exactly what my Father knew I needed, in that moment. God is good, people, and He cares that much – enough to get mundane with you – “kid, take a shower”. 😄
So why this story? Well, I decided to write this as encouragement to whomever might read it that may be going through a tough time, and also as a reminder to my future self. If the storm in your life gets heavy, just seek Shelter – and while you’re at it, grab yourself a shower, a song, and some ‘sponsibility. 🙏🏽